Advertisements

Late Night Thoughts

hahaha I thought I was done for the day, but wait, I’ve got some good shit.

2 things:

1. Why do all the people who park in the handicapped spots park better than those who aren’t in handicap spots? LOL I mean seriously, have you looked? Maybe it’s just the cars I’ve happen to see, but man. It’s just…ironically funny. Handicap parkers are neat and in the lines and straight. Everyone else is like “welp! I’m gonna be a douche and double park and leave the butt of my car hanging out for everyone to hit!!” It’s funny to me..

2. Have you seen pretty little liars? It’s a tv show on abcfamily. I really don’t want to watch it but, sweet Magdalene, every 5 seconds there is a twist in the plot and someone is pregnant and someone else had a baby and hid it from the baby-daddy for 7 years and someone else is talking to people she shouldn’t talk to, and someone finds a spiral with notes in it with secret stuff and pictures. And that’s only half of it! It’s rachet lol

Alright, yall leave me alone and stop asking me to spew my thoughts. I have class at 8 in the morning which means I have to be up by 10am…wait…hahaha

Class vs Food

I think we can all agree here: food trumps class.

The wonderful world of Tuesdays consists of class from 2 – 6:15 pm and rehearsal from 6:25- 7:40pm. I powered through until about 5 oclock before my stomach punched me in the face. I surrendered and threw up the white flag as I quietly slipped out of class and into the food court.

BANK.

Wendy’s 10pc nugget saved my soul today. Thank you Wendy. And to my professor, I’m sorry. I know you wanted to teach me some brilliant things in that CIS class, but you and I both know the only think I would have been paying attention to was the grumble in my belly. I’ve learned, though. If the last time I eat is 11am, then  I need to pack a lunch for the rest of the day! …or, I could just never go to class….lol jk jk brown paper bag it is.

I’m not lazy, I just don’t want to do my homework. It’s my LAST semester of COLLEGE, and I’m feeling the burn, baby! My goodness. Year after year of conforming to do these homework assignments, and the last time I have to do any of them, I can’t will myself to do it! I think […]

Panic Attacks

It’s this pinch in my stomach

I can’t help but wiggle and writhe on the floor

Then my head feels swollen like I pumped it with a can of whipped cream, except there’s no whipped cream inside; only puffy, sweet madness of air pressure

My heart goes on overdrive and grows wings made out of swords, flying right out my eyes, oh Lord

I give in to the fatigue and collapse on the floor, vomit on the tip of my brain but not my tongue

Then fear takes hold of me. Fear of breathing. Fear of not breathing. Fear that if I don’t get out of this place, wherever I am, I’ll die a slow painful death. I’ll suffocate.

I run to nowhere end up somewhere. Choking on my tears, somehow I’m crying now. Freezing weather outside and the only barrier between my body and the punching cold air is a damp towel wrapped around me.

My brain freezes over and is numb; my realization that my hair is wet because I just got out the shower.

Confronted and told to come inside the house, I scream to be alone and for everyone to stay away from me.

Naked with my fear, my sickness.

Moments passed; my resistance took a break. Both them and me, allowing me to stumble back inside and fall to my knees. I pray for peace.

My tears fade to soft hums of discomfort. I see worried eyes of a child, instructing me to go lay down; I oblige.

My hair steams from the extreme temperature change, and I fall to a cozy slumber of forgetting; dreaming that this would be the last